R U OK Day isn’t OK for some

Have you ever felt stuck? I sure have, and I’m feeling it acutely this week.

I feel stuck in grief; in sadness; sometimes I wonder if it’s a place I’m getting too comfortable in…if it’s even possible to be comfortable. I certainly don’t enjoy it, yet it’s been a huge challenge to pull myself out.

My introvert self would be quite happy to stay home and not go out, engage with others, or be in the world. But that isn’t terribly practical.

Days like last week’s ‘R U OK’ day remind me I’m not. This year’s message was, ‘Are they really OK?’; that is, to ask things like, ‘Are you sure?’ if the person who clearly isn’t OK says they are. I know if I were pressed on that, especially in the workplace, I would shut down, or feel worse. I guess everyone is different. But the approach to asking people if they’re OK should be, too. I’m open to being vulnerable (this blog is a case in point), but I disagree that vulnerability can be measured or has a standard.

I’m certainly not encouraging ignoring someone who’s in distress. What I am saying is tread with care.

(And yes, I really am OK). :)